2012-02-10T11:55:00.000-08:00

I need a change in life; in another word, I need to get a life.

Everything seems to blurred out of my sights for long, really long. I stayed up half of the time in the night figuring out what's amissed yet, I've no clues. Reading my past blogposts, I realised the motivations I used to have, are gone.

I don't denied I used to be a party animal, I don't deny I used to be a "Xiao ah-lian" who skipped school, vulgarities in every sentence, hanging in town with a batch of friends, doing nothing and worse come to worst I flanked my final examination. Yea, the companies of friends I have, totally gone case. But in another perspective, I've learnt a lot from them too. Friends eventually fades away because everyone have got their own dreams, own aims to pursue.

As far as I know, my friends did colored my life. "Friends are like crayons, they never failed to occupied your empty sheet of paper." Now, at the age of 17+ , when I rewind back every scenes they gave me, I never failed to have a smile.

The worst thing I could ever do, abandoned my friends because I'm madly in love with some guys whom I thought "Forever" does exist yet each time, it just proves me wrong. But you know what, I still never regretted of the choices I made, even up till today.

Come to realisation, that girl have gone. I guess that's why there's a saying "Maturity doesn't counts by ages but the experiences. " I know myself well enough that I ain't gonna lead those kind of "Struggling life" those friends of mine is going through now and it really motivated me to study harder than before. Hence, I stopped contacting anyone, to the extent of deleting my previous Facebook account to totally cut-off contacts with them.

Things went smoother than I thought, I A's my subjects. But there's always something amissed. Emptiness.

Lately, there's far too much things troubling me. Be it relationship, friendship. I can't help it but to go missing in action in the social world. I know that's a coward act. Moreover, with people around stressing me up, and personally I don't really blogged much about my current situation because as I know there's people out there, gossiping about me, my blogposts once I blogged about my personal stuffs hence, I just should shut the F up.

Currently, I managed to get myself back somehow and you know what, I ain't gonna be that girl anymore. I want a change in my life, in the friends I'm currently mixing with, the current situation I'm in. Shits happen and you know what, I'm gonna stand stronger than you think I'd.

I'd start being a full-time blogger from now on and more actiavate in everything.

Zoyi's